Vandag is weer een van my droom dae. En ek wonder.....................en droom.........en wonder: Is ek en my man goeie ouers en leer ons, die kinders die regte waardes en normes van die lewe????
Ek het drie van hulle soos julle reeds weet Carlien (16) Willem (15) en Christiaan (11) . Elkeen het sy eie persoonlikheid en talente. Ek en Pa het 'n BAIE oop verhouding met al drie. Ons klomp kan lekker stry en baklei oor sekere aspekte van die lewe. Ek is die preker in die gesin, elke geleentheid wat ek kry, preek ek oor dwelms, seks, dronkbestuur ens. My kinders wil partykeer mal raak, maar dit sit my geensins onder nie. Pa is die meer reguit een en loop nie draaie nie, hy noem 'n ding op sy naam en basta. Soos julle kan dink, kan ons familie gesprekke nogal in 'n sirkus ontaard, maar de laaste een mis sulke gesels sessie vir niks.
Ek voel bevoorreg dat ons nog so met veral ons tieners kan praat, want as ek om my kyk sien ek 'n baie hartseer prentjie in baie gesinne, waar ma of pa nie eers weet waar hul tiener seun of dogter op 'n Vrydgaand is nie. Myne weet, ek neem hulle na waar ookal en gaan haal hulle weer. Vir hulle is die ergste die inkomtye, want lyk my nie ander kinders ken van so 'n reël nie. Ek gee sondagskool vir graad 7's (std 5), toe ek een oggend vra wat hul inkomtye is, was ek verstom. Die meeste het nie so iets nie en die fynste kleinste dingetjie, wat nie 13 nie maar 8 lyk sê so ewe: My pa sê solank ek net voor 2 uur in die huis is, is hy tevrede. Nou vra ek julle met trane in my oë, wat maak 'n 13jarige meisiekind daai tyd (of na 10uur) op straat of in 'n sentrum of waar ookal?
Ag ek weet hierdie is 'n onderwerp wat ek en julle seker ook 'n boek oor kan skryf, maar gister toe ek Dellie se blog lees wat sy aan haar Seuna opgedra het, toe werk my brein weer oortyd. Vra het hier kom vasskop: Is my kind reg vir die wêreld daarbuite? Het ek hom/haar die regte dinge geleer? Het ek hulle nie bietjies te veel vasgehou en probeer beskerm nie? Moet ek nie dalk met die kleintjie probeer, deur meer vryheid te gee nie? Luister hulle as Ma so preek?
Kry hulle nie dalk te veel nie?
Ek het toe maar besluit, dat die beste sou wees as elke kind gebore word met 'n boek onder die arm, wat vir ma en pa presies sê hoe die kind grootgemaak moet word. Iets soos 'n "users guide." Dink julle nie dit sou dinge soveel makliker gemaak het nie? Dink nou net as Boeta vra hoe laat hy by die huis moet wees en jy kan gou vinnig in die boek kyk wat sê: Beste inkom tyd vir Willem op 15 jarige ouderdom: 11 uur. Dan sou hulle nie kon stry of jou probeer ompraat nie, want dis wit op swart en met sy of haar naam op.
Ag, ek weet ek praat nou sommer nonsens, want wat sal ek tog doen sonder die redenasies en opinies van my 3 terroriste.
Carlien, Willem en Christiaan: Pappa en Mamma is ongelooflik trots op julle. Ons liefde is nimmereindigend en julle weet waarheen julle kan kom met enige vrae en onsekerheid. Ons het toe nie boeke gekry met julle geboorte nie, maar tot dusver glo en vertrou ons, is ons op die regte pad.
Mag julle almal 'n wonderlike, sonnige en amazing week hê, en onthou die Secret!
Liefde
Annie
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Annie dis moeilik soos jy skrywe. Ek is weer die mattige een in die huis en Marilee die vuurvreter wat dinge op die naam noem. Ek/ons het net vir Steyn(12) en soms wonder ek baie oor hom, wat gaan hy doen. Sal hy verantwoordelikheid hê.
En dan ontspan mens maar net en dink jy het jou beste vir hom gegee. Jy het die beste gereedskap vir om ingepak vir sy reis die grootmens wereld in, wat kan jy meer doen?
Dis vir my so belangrik daardie vrymoedigheid wat hy moet hê om HUIS toe te kom en weet waar sy huis is.
Ek stem saam jou, Dellie het 'n PUIK posting aan Seuna opgedra.
Eben
Annie my twee is my alles, ek het hulle van kleins af reg geleer, mense het my al hoevele komplimente gegee oor my twee se maniere, dit laat 'n ma se hart sommer baie vinniger klop. Mense praat graag van my twee wat jy altyd deur 'n ring kan trek, en wat weet wanneer om hulle monde te hou. Met my oupa se roudiens het daar 'n vreemde tannie na my toe gekom wat in dieselfde blok woonstelle as my oorlede oupa gebly het, die kinders het gereeld saam my pa na my oupa toe gegaan, die tannie se woorde was: Mensie jy het twee prag kinders met die allermooiste maniertjies, hulle is goed opgevoed ken hulle plek, en is altyd so netjies. Annie dit het my goed laat voel. Dit is nie in vandag se dae maklik om 'n seun netjies te hou nie, want hulle dra mos hierdie jeans wat lyk of hulle 'n drol in hulle broeke het met 'n bokser wat MOET uitsteek, Jaco weet as ek hom so sien, sal ek hom persoonlik self gaan aantrek!! So ook my meisiekind, sy weet ek kan nie vat laat die meisies se onderklere so uitsteek nie, hel kan hulle nie maar eerder die hipster eerste aantrek en dan die stuk pantie bo oor nie, dan hoef hulle nie so baie te buk nie!!
Ek het ook gevoel kinders moet met 'n user gide kom!! Weet jy ek was die ander dag so kwaad vir my seuntjie (6)- ek se vir hom: ek weet nie meer wat om met jou te doen nie, ek voel lus en sluit jou in die badkamer totdat jy ore kry. Sy antwoord was: you know mommy i just need love. En soos die spreekwoord se: uit die mond van 'n suigeling!!!!
Dis al wat hulle nodig het
Lekker naweek vir jou!
Ai, Annie, dit sou rerig lekker gewees het as hulle met 'n handboek onder die arm gekom het!
Maar weet jy, soos wat hulle ouer word, dink ek die belangrikste ding is wat julle alreeds het: julle PRAAT met mekaar! Kyk, ek is nogsteeds senuweeagtig oor sy toekoms, maar maatjie, om hom tot hier te gekry het in een stuk, sjoe, ek kan dit self nie glo nie!
En ek dink sodra daar nie kommunikasie is nie, raak dinge moeilik. Ons verskil ook maar oor dinge, maar ek voel dat hy baie verantwoordelik is, so ek is nie heeltyd op sy case nie. En as daar nie soveel pressure is nie, maak hulle makliker oop. En as jy weet wat aangaan in hulle lewens en vriendekring, is dit makliker om leiding te gee. En te gesels oor dinge wat ander miskien sal sien as preek. Ons praat net eenvoudig daaroor, dis feite en die gevare daar buite is realiteit, maar ons ruk ook nie die dam onder die eend uit nie.
Leer hulle vriende ken, nooi hulle huistoe. Seun se pels kuier baie graag hier, slaap sommer oor, dan kan hulle mos so laat kuier soos wat hulle wil. En party keer gesels van daai pels diep dinge met my en Liefie, want hulle is te bang om dit by die huis te doen. Ten minste luister IEMAND darem vir hulle.
Dit pas my as hulle hier wil kuier, ek treat hulle met lekker eetgoed en so aan, want dan weet ek waar hulle is, en dat hulle veilig is. As mens nie sterk is nie, moet jy mos slim wees! Hehe!
Maar ek is seker julle sal OK wees.
O ja, ek het iets vergeet, maar ek dink jy weet dit: Jy moet baie BID!
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